Come a Visitin, we're a welcomin' all!

Y'all can come view our Hillbilly fuel treatment plant and we'd love to have ya!

Here are directions to the farm:

You go south from Chicago (Chicago is the state where Illinois is located) till all the cars in your rear view mirror are following you at less than a five foot distance. Both the men and the women down here do that when they're looking for a fist fight, so you little guys be careful.

Turn off the paved road by the barn where Cindy Lou was deflowered and keep going till you get to where the old oak tree used to be.

Turn right by Billy Bob's still and then left where the revenuers are hiding in the woods.

Take a left at a restaurant called Granny's possum pie. Note, on the right, that she saves the oil for our fuel in large stewing vats where she also ages road kill.

Take another left at green slime pond and your on our road. Don't worry about crazy old Pappy Silas, unless he has his gun with him.

Go to the end of that road and turn back to the way you came. We'll be the 2nd still on the right.

We'll leave an oil lamp burning for Y'all.

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